Reality Bites

Let’s face it: some days are better than others. I can remember being 14-15 years old when teenage drama classified as “the worst day of my life”. I said that so many times, it’s a shame. No kids, that isn’t the worst day of your life. Try finding out that you probably won’t ever have children of your own. That’ll be the worst day of your life.

That’s exactly how my day went. I found out that I have so many cysts on my ovaries, they can’t even count them. My ovaries looked black and unhealthy. I have 3 options: birth control pills, diabetic medicine, or a hysterectomy. I’m 21… Not 50+, which is the menopausal age.

When I married Eric, I couldn’t wait to have babies with him. That’s been my lifelong dream. Eric would be a wonderful daddy. He’s amazing to our chihuahua/mountain feist mix, Bella. He was an adorable, chubby, dark haired, dark eyed baby. Along with my dark hair/eye genes, I knew our babies would be out of this world beautiful…. Only to be told that it probably won’t happen.

Before we ever got married, we decided we would have at least 3 kids, if not 4. It breaks my heart to know that I probably won’t be able to give him what he has dreamed of as well. I worried that he wouldn’t want to be with me anymore, but if you know my husband, you know that’s not the case. 

This man loves me when I hate myself. I am so mean to him sometimes, (don’t let him fool you, he throws it back at me. Lol.) but he loves me anyways. 

Who knows what we’ll end up doing. We can adopt, or find a surrogate mother. We can try fertility treatments and IVF. Or, we can have 4-legged babies like Bella and travel the world. Whatever happens, we know that God has a say in it 110%. 

XOXOXO—Emily

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